Road Trip: Miracle of Car Seats

The trip out to Bloomington. Oh. Dear. God. Help. Us.

We made it. I swear I thought that I had an ulcer the entire time. But, somehow, by God’s grace, we made it. Car seats are truly miraculous – the way they safely contain the babies and induce sleep.

Something about parenthood – there is this undercurrent of anxiety that permeates everything in my life now like nothing I’ve ever felt before. It probably is a symptom of post-partum depression, which I may or may not have right now, more likely, it’s baby blues or some such like it. But, I have never felt so intensely uncertain and nervous about another human being’s welfare in my entire life. It isn’t just emotional – it’s physiological…my heart pounds way too often and I sometimes feel weird pressure in my feet, like I did towards the end of the pregnancy and was dealing with mild preeclampsia, high blood pressure and water retention. Entering into parenthood…means entering into a world of pain, in some ways. Heartbreak, mostly, I imagine. This is going to be a season of learning how to seriously trust…

Ultimately, I maybe wouldn’t have minded just being in a car seat the whole way…blissfully unawares and asleep. It would be nice for so many things in my life.

3 thoughts on “Road Trip: Miracle of Car Seats

  • May 31, 2011 at 1:39 pm
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    I remember in the first few months of Berkley’s life, it actually physically HURT me to hear him cry. There is a physicality about being a new mother that can’t possibly be understood until one reaches that place. I get it.

    • May 31, 2011 at 10:06 pm
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      Thank you for affirming that, Court! I kept trying to explain that to Andy especially in the beginning when D was colicky and cried forever for a while. I literally said to Andy as he looked at me blankly, “It hurts my body hearing them cry.” I feel better now.

  • June 15, 2011 at 2:36 pm
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    Im way behind on this, but YES. The twisty-stomach feeling was so real for me too. It really is physical. Hope things are moving along. And I totally want a carseat for myself.

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