This post is part of a series called “Motherhood Mantras.” To read more about the series, and the full list of writers, click here.
When Mihee asked me if I would write a post for her Motherhood Mantras series, I have to admit that the first thing that came to mind was the image of Aibileen in The Help saying over and over to little Mae Mobley, “You is kind, you is smart, you is important.”
Of all the relationships in that movie (please don’t shoot me, I didn’t actually read the book), that is the one that really affected me the most and the one that made me bawl my eyes out more than once! And those words, they stuck for me, as I am sure they did for all the little Mae Mobleys of the world who ever heard them from a caregiver. These words made a damn good mantra for any child or woman to hear over and over again.
And then I started thinking more and more about the mantras that I have in my life. The things that I say to myself to get me through rough patches, to celebrate the good times and the words that just make me feel good about myself and my life.
I came across some very inspiring words about six months ago on a family trip to Canmore and feel that these words encompass all of the mantras and personal beliefs that I have about how to live a happy and fulfilled life. This week I really needed to re-read that post and this one too to help me get back on track after what is often referred to as one of the most stressful events in a person’s life…
Our lives have been in flux for the past few months of packing, living in a house of boxes, meetings with contractors, subcontractors and designers and then finally moving into the Natural Urban Home. The kids have been quite accommodating (as kids usually are) during this whole process, and outside of a few minor behaviour incidents, have weathered all this change in their little lives with relative ease.
But in all of the packing and moving and meetings and decisions and phone calls and all the rest of the long lists of things that I have had to do lately, I have forgotten all about ME. I have not taken care of myself and I have not remembered my own very important motherhood mantra …
Happy mama, no more drama!
I have not been a doing the things that make me a ‘Happy Mama’ and as a result has been LOTS of DRAMA! Lots of me losing my temper, yelling at the kids, having little to no patience for anyone or anything, and very little time for me. All forms of ‘self-care’ have flown out the window for the last little while and it is really starting to take its toll.
So I am going back to my mantra, living the words I created for myself and doing something about it!
This week is all about ME. I went for a physiotherapy appointment today to take care of the aches and pains that have been bothering me, tomorrow I am getting a relaxing massage and the day after that I am finally getting a very much overdue hair cut and color.
AND on Sunday morning I am heading back to my zen place and going to the Bikram yoga studio for 90 minutes of peace, focus and sweet, sweet, SWEAT!! (Seriously, two months away from my happy ME place is FAR too long!)
I guess for me, the whole idea of a mantra is that the words you repeat to yourself are not just words. They are powerful words that are capable of creating transformations. So whatever you need to say to yourself to make the changes you want, spiritual changes, physical changes and/or emotional changes or shifts, these are your mantras. And the key is not just to say them over and over to yourself, it is to LIVE them too.
Trust me. This is what will keep you going and get you to the top of that mountain!
Natasha Chiam is the Lipstick Crunchy Mama behind Natural Urban Mamas. She has been at this motherhood gig for the past 5 years now and in that time has learned a thing or two about natural parenting – babywearing in particular, being an entrepreneur and finding out what really matters in this life. She believes that balance is over-rated and the best way to survive and thrive in this role we call Mama is to be flexible, hence her love of yoga to maintain her bendy-ness! You can follow her on Twitter @naturalurbanmom and on her Facebook page!